Relationships, Wesleyan and You
I remember when many of my prefrosh asked me long ago what the dating scene at Wesleyan is like. To answer, I have asked several of my friends in an email about their take on said dating scene. Needless to say, most of my friends don't read their email. They may, in fact, not be good friends at all.
Ahem.
Anyway.
Janet DeWar '09: I have seen so many varieties of relationships at Wesleyan that I hesitate to make any sort of blanket statement. But I will say that a lot of them seem to start out with sex and add the realtionship part afterwards. It's rather disheartening. I hear a lot about how we're horrible at relationships and none of the guys here have the emotional maturity to keep them up, but I know of a bunch of pretty successful couples.
So, in short: Relationships at Wesleyan can happen, but it's not that easy.
Marianna Foos '08: Some people are looking for relationships, and some aren't. If you start pursuing someone, you want to be sure which type they are. My advice to frosh is not to get into a relationship until you know who your friends are, and what your priorities are. It's really easy to spend too much time with a significant other, and neglect your friends.
And on the lack of "dating" by college aged students:
Janet DeWar '09: By "date" I'll assume you mean "take each other out for nights on the town involving movies and dinners and awkward conversations about who's paying." I think that we don't date because it requires too much effort. We all live together, so there's no need to date in order to see each other like there is in the real world.
Actually, I'm a big supporter of the lack of dating. Too much pressure. Can't we just hang out?
Ahem.
Anyway.
Janet DeWar '09: I have seen so many varieties of relationships at Wesleyan that I hesitate to make any sort of blanket statement. But I will say that a lot of them seem to start out with sex and add the realtionship part afterwards. It's rather disheartening. I hear a lot about how we're horrible at relationships and none of the guys here have the emotional maturity to keep them up, but I know of a bunch of pretty successful couples.
So, in short: Relationships at Wesleyan can happen, but it's not that easy.
Marianna Foos '08: Some people are looking for relationships, and some aren't. If you start pursuing someone, you want to be sure which type they are. My advice to frosh is not to get into a relationship until you know who your friends are, and what your priorities are. It's really easy to spend too much time with a significant other, and neglect your friends.
And on the lack of "dating" by college aged students:
Janet DeWar '09: By "date" I'll assume you mean "take each other out for nights on the town involving movies and dinners and awkward conversations about who's paying." I think that we don't date because it requires too much effort. We all live together, so there's no need to date in order to see each other like there is in the real world.
Actually, I'm a big supporter of the lack of dating. Too much pressure. Can't we just hang out?
posted by Wesleying at 6:24 PM
3 Comments:
You are a true trooper of WesBlog 10. If any pre-frosh asks me about dating...I will refer them to this post.
More on dating: From what I've seen, all sorts of relationships exist. Meeting new people after your 1st semester is the hardest part... there are hookups at parties, if you're into that, and serious wesmarriage, if you're into that. There isn't a "going on dates" scene, because the Wesleyan equivalent is "want to come over to my room and watch a movie on my laptop?" This makes it way less easy to tell it's a date, and leads to plenty of awkward and slightly adorable confusion, but hey, it's way cheaper!
P.S. If you'd sent it to my real e-mail (mjweiss) and not my fake one (mweiss) maybe I would have responded :P!
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